More than Communication, it is the Connection that Keeps a Relationship Strong

Author: Yaji Category: Counseling & Communication, Love, Relationships Published: February 19, 2014

It is a commonly held notion that a healthy communication between couples is the most important thing in a relationship. While communication is a critically important component of connection, it is not all there is. More than communication, feeling connected is the true measure of a relationship’s survival and health. A sense of connection in your relationship leads to warmth and understanding, safety and trust – the attributes that help overcome difficulties and conflicts when they arise (and they always will, even in the best of relationships). The good news is that communication is but one way to build connection.

Treating the Relationship as an Individual Entity

Most of Western medicine is finally catching up on the fact that we are more than just our mind, more than just our body, and more than just our spirit (if you believe in such things). The orientation is growing more into one of a holistic / integrated view that mind affects body affects spirit, and so on. It’s not nature vs nurture, it’s both! The same goes when treating couples and relationships. The relationship is greater than the sum of each individual in it. When treating couples and individuals, we look for health in 5 key areas:

  • Mind / Psyche / Psychology / Thoughts, etc.
  • Body / Physical / Senses / Sensations
  • Emotions / Sensations / Love & Fear
  • Spirit / Connection to something greater / Higher Self / Energy / Purpose, etc.
  • Social / Friends / Community

First it is important to get clear on these pieces within yourself and then share with your partner. Next, find as many ways to connect in as many of these areas as possible. The more ways you can find to connect in any one of these areas, the less it will bother you when you notice times of disconnect. This connection builds the love, harmony, warmth, understanding, safety and trust, and ultimately leads to long lasting, intimate, healthy relationships.

About Love Therapy Center: Founded by Yaji Tramontini in 2008, the Love Therapy Center was created with the purpose of promoting healthy relationships for couples and individuals. Located in San Francisco, San Diego and San Jose, therapists at the Love Therapy Center are trained in both traditional and nontraditional/spiritual modalities which allows them to fit each person with individualized treatment. To learn more about Love Therapy Center visit its website
About the Author: Yagi Tramontini is a graduate of Boston University ('94) with a double major in Psychology & Philosophy, and Sophia University ('03) with a Master's degree in Transpersonal / Spiritual Counseling Psychology. She holds a CA state license as a Marriage & Family Therapist, MFC45878, to practice Psychotherapy and has over 10,000 hours helping couples and individuals release trauma and create great relationships